Haunting Secrets
by steph84
Summary: When Hermione is engaged to Draco Malfoy, she's devastated. But what will she discover when she reads Lily Evans' diary?
1. Marriage?

She shifted in the uncomfortable chair, anxiously awaiting the arrival of Professor Dumbledore. While she waited, she glanced around the Headmaster's office walls, staring at the portraits she had seen so many times before. Some of them were snoozing, as usual, but some were wide- awake, staring back at her, whispering amongst themselves.  
  
"Quiet," she hissed at the closest picture, as Armando Dippet began pointing his finger at her, talking in a hushed voice to anyone who would listen. Hermione gave him a dirty look.  
  
"Sorry to have kept you waiting Miss Granger." Professor Dumbledore breezed into his office, a flurry of robes. His usually serene face displayed direct hints of discontentment. Some unknown force of unhappiness had speeded along his normally slow waltz into a room and Hermione felt her heart start to race.  
  
Ever since her parents had confessed to her last year that they were pureblooded wizards, she had been unaware of everyone around her. What if all of her friends were lying to her, too? If her parents could deceive her in such a manner, who's to say that she should trust her friends and acquaintances? "We're sorry we lied to you," her mother had told her tearfully, "but we were afraid of what you might think. Your father and I only wanted the best for you in life and until you got your school letter, we weren't planning on ever telling you about your heritage."  
  
"So instead you waited until my sixth year at Hogwarts to tell me that I'm a pureblood?" Hermione had replied angrily. She couldn't describe to anyone the feelings of deception and hurt that were flowing through her at that very moment. "You let me go through six years of hell, with that slime Draco Malfoy calling me a Mudblood every few feet? You let me suffer through all of that before alerting me to the fact that for those six years, Malfoy was wrong and I was just as 'pure and clean' as he was? Thanks a lot!"  
  
It had been almost a year since that day and Hermione had forgiven her parents to some extent. Now, as she sat in Dumbledore's office, with only five months left until she left Hogwarts forever, Hermione waited to see what other surprises would be bestowed upon her before leaving school.  
  
Dumbledore had sat down at his desk, opposite of Hermione, and folded his hands neatly in front of him. He wore a slight smile on his tired- looking face, but sympathy reigned in his eyes. "We're just waiting for two more members of our party," he said, glancing patiently towards the doorway. "I won't say anything until they've arrived."  
  
Unable to speak for fear of what may come out of her mouth, Hermione kept quiet. She watched as the giant clock on the wall ticked the minutes away and wondered what Ron and Harry were doing back in the common room, where she longed to be. When she had left, being summoned to Dumbledore's office by means of an owl, they were playing a game of Exploding Snap, a game Hermione had long ago ruled indecent. But as her heart pounded faster and more furious than before, she would have given anything to be playing the silly game with them right then. Her instincts told her that nothing good was going to come out of this meeting.  
  
Her worst fears were confirmed when seconds later, the office door burst open again, revealing Lucius Malfoy, closely followed by his son Draco. Bowing her head, Hermione swore under her breath. She hadn't liked Draco on the best of days, let alone his father. Lucius Malfoy had always been one of the more malicious wizards Hermione had ever known and he promoted purebloods one hundred percent. He had always looked down his nose at Hermione, but the news of her being a pureblood was just as shocking to him as it was to her.  
  
"Good day Dumbledore," he wheedled in his sickening voice. "Miss Granger." He looked down at her, approval in his eyes, as he passed her by. Taking the chair one over from her, he offered the one in between to Draco. "I assume you've told Miss Granger why we've assembled here today, Dumbledore?"  
  
"No, Lucius, I haven't. I've voiced against this from the beginning, but to no avail. As Miss Granger is not my child, I do not have a say and I will let you do the explaining." Dumbledore looked immediately regretful at the words 'not my child', as he had come to know Harry, Ron and Hermione as somewhat of his children over the years. He sat back in his chair, almost painfully, his hands still folded, and waited for the explosion.  
  
"Miss Granger, as you know, your news of being a pureblood has reached me rather quickly," Lucius began, motioning to Draco.  
  
"I guess that's why you waited an entire year to come and see me," Hermione quipped, shooting daggers at the both of them with her eyes. "It wouldn't make sense to see me right away, now would it?"  
  
"Yes, well, I must apologize for that on my behalf," Lucius continued, his eyes darting from Dumbledore back to Hermione. "Nevertheless, I have a purpose here today." He smiled and sat up straighter. "My son is seventeen now and he is of wealthy blood. He will marry in a few years, and marry a girl of my choosing. A girl of pureblood. A girl of a good family name." His lips spread into a wider grin, as he looked Hermione up and down. "A girl with good brains, a good upbringing, not to mention good looks."  
  
"No," Hermione said calmly, truly unclear of what she was actually saying. "You're crazy. The both of you. I will not marry Draco!"  
  
"My dear girl, you have no choice," Lucius continued, looking somewhat relieved that he didn't have to say the words aloud. "Your parents have already agreed."  
  
"My parents would not agree to that!" Hermione said, rising to her feet. "They care about me! They wouldn't let me suffer like that!"  
  
"Much like they wouldn't let you suffer, thinking you were a Mudblood?" Lucius' voice had become colder and crueller than before. "When all along you have been a noble pureblood? Any time, they could have told you, but they failed. What makes you think they would spare you this time?"  
  
"You're a liar!" Hermione screamed at the top of her lungs. "I won't marry him! I won't do it!" She looked to Professor Dumbledore for help. "Please, Professor, say I don't have to marry him! Surely you can do something."  
  
"As I said before, Hermione, regrettably you are not my daughter." His face looked sadder than Hermione had seen him in years and she felt the floods of tears pouring down her face. "You can't do this," she hissed at Lucius. "You won't get away with it."  
  
"We'll be in touch soon," Lucius called as Hermione fled the office. Down the spiral staircase she ran and through the halls. She passed by Professor McGonagall, who called after her, but she didn't stop. She didn't stop running until she had reached the portrait hole for the Gryffindor common room. She muttered the password and entered the room, grateful to see that it was nearly empty. Only Harry and Ron remained, playing a solid game of chess in the corner.  
  
"What happened?" Ron asked, seeing Hermione's tear-streaked face and astray hair. "What was the meeting about?"  
  
Hermione collapsed on the sofa beside Harry. "They want me to marry Draco Malfoy!"  
  
Silence reigned in the room after this statement. Ron, who had knowingly had strong feelings for Hermione for years, looked on in shock. "They can't force you," he said unconvincingly. "Your parents won't allow it."  
  
"That's just the thing," Hermione cried, burying her face in her hands. "Lucius Malfoy said my parents had already agreed to it!" Hermione relived the entire scene in Dumbledore's office as she explained it to her friends, sobbing hysterically the whole time. "It's so wrong!" she cried.  
  
"Surely there's something that can be done," Harry said quietly and Hermione looked up at him. Ever since Sirius had died in their fifth year, Harry hadn't been the same. He was more quiet, more subdued. Sometimes he would fly off into a rage for no reason and other times, things never seemed to bother him. Hermione felt bad for wallowing in her own problems when one of her close friends was in such anguish, but this time, she couldn't help it.  
  
"I think I'll write my parents," she said, wiping the tears from her eyes. "That's it. I'll write them and ask and they'll write back and say the whole thing is absurd. Right, that's what will happen." She smiled through the remaining tears. "Everything will be okay," she assured herself. "Just fine." 


	2. A Letter From Home

Dearest Hermione,  
  
I'm so sorry that your father and I couldn't be there to tell you the news ourselves. But isn't it wonderful? You will be taking on one of the most prominent names in all the wizarding land! The Malfoys are very wealthy indeed and you will be most happy living in Malfoy Manor.  
  
As for Ron, my dear, he will get over it, as you will. I know right now it hurts to have to leave someone you care for so much, but as time passes, it will heal. Trust me on that, please.  
  
You may be asking yourself why your father and I agreed to such an proposal and the truth is, Hermione, I have to confess that I think the Malfoys will be able to provide for you much better than the Weasleys. I hold nothing against Ron and his family, believe me, but I just don't think that you should be associating with such a family now that everyone knows your true heritage.  
  
I'm sorry, honey, but sometimes good things can be concealed in the most unlikely packages. Your father and I will visit you soon; you won't be leaving for the manor until after school has ended.  
  
Take care, my darling. Love, Mum and Dad  
  
The letter brought more rage to Hermione's mind than when her parents had told her she truly was a pureblood. She crumpled it in her fist and threw it on the floor just as two of her female friends entered the room.  
  
"What was that?" Parvati Patil asked, watching silent tears stream down Hermione's face. "An angry letter from a friend or something?"  
  
"What's going on with you, Hermione?" Padma Patil asked as she sat down on her own bed and began examining her fingernails. "I heard that you were betrothed to Draco Malfoy." She let out a hollow laugh. "What a joke."  
  
Hermione emitted a small sob and Padma looked immediately regretful. "Oh, Hermione, it's not true, is it?"  
  
"Yes," Hermione whined, grinding her fists into her eyes. She buried her face in her hands and sobbed heavily, feeling the comforting hands on her back. "That letter is from my parents, confirming it."  
  
"May I read it?" Parvati asked, picking up the ball of paper. Hermione nodded miserably and Parvati unravelled the paper, reading it's wrinkled page. "I never knew your parents were like that," she said quietly placing the letter in her sister's outstretched hands.  
  
"Nor did I," Hermione wailed, "but I guess since they kept the fact that I'm a pureblood from me so long, they figured they can control my life!"  
  
"So are you going to go through with it?" Padma asked, folding the letter in half after reading it. "I mean, Hermione Malfoy doesn't exactly ring, does it?"  
  
Hermione began giggling. Despite all the pressure and pain that was donated to her, she couldn't help but find her new doomed name somewhat humorous. "My middle name is Miranda," she said quietly. "Hermione Miranda Malfoy." She began to laugh out loud.  
  
"At least that kind of takes the edge off the bitterness of the name Malfoy," Parvati said, giggling. The atmosphere of the room went sombre again as Parvati asked, "Does Ron know?"  
  
Hermione nodded. "Yes. I told both him and Harry as soon as I got back from Dumbledore's office two nights ago." She sighed. "I don't think he's too happy."  
  
"Can you blame him?" Padma asked. "You two have been destined for each other, like, forever!" Her voice got deathly quiet. "Have you seen Malfoy yet?"  
  
"He was with his father when I was told," Hermione replied, wiping the stray tears off her face. "He didn't say too much. But I haven't seen him since."  
  
"I'm surprised," Padma quipped while Parvati handed Hermione tissues. "You would think he would be gloating and everything." She sighed and looked at her wristwatch. "Well, I had better get back to my own common room. They're going to think I've abdicated from my own house pretty soon!" She bid the two remaining girls a good night and left the dorm.  
  
Parvati turned to Hermione, smiling gently. "I'm sure things will look up soon," she said, trying to be helpful. "Talk to your parents. See what they're reasoning is."  
  
"Yeah," Hermione muttered, knowing that deep down inside her heart it would do no good.  
  
News of the engagement spread quickly, although not too many students were willing to say all that much. Everywhere Hermione went, students stared at her left ring finger, which remained empty, and teachers gave her sad, sympathetic smiles. Except for Severus Snape, the Potions master and head of Slytherin house. He grinned spitefully at her every chance he got. "Going to join us soon?" he asked as he passed by her desk in class one afternoon. "I can't wait."  
  
Hermione spent as much time as she could in a dark corner of the library, trying to escape from the world. She would sit on the floor, read long books and write sad, complicated poems, just to rid herself of the injustice that had become her life. No one dared to bother her here so she was surprised when she looked up one day to see Professor Dumbledore hovering above her.  
  
"Professor!" she cried, rather surprised to see him. "What are you doing here?"  
  
"Seeing how you are," he replied, bending down to sit against the large stack of books. "How are you doing?"  
  
Hermione shrugged while studying her shoes. "Okay, I guess," she finally replied. "I haven't seen Malfoy yet, so until then I'm pretty sure I'll be okay."  
  
"Mr. Weasley wasn't all too pleased with the news," Dumbledore stated sadly. "The other evening, he threw his fist through a glass window and had to receive immediate medical attention from Madam Pomfrey."  
  
"I know," Hermione said sadly. "I think he's mad at me, but how can he be? It's not my fault."  
  
"I think he will realize that with time," Dumbledore said, looking around with interest. "What a significant place to hide out."  
  
"What do you mean?"  
  
He looked at the girl with fascination. "You have chosen the exact same spot to hide out that Harry's mother, Lily Evans, often did."  
  
"Really?" For a moment, all Hermione's troubles were forgotten as she relished this news. "Why did she hide out here?"  
  
"From James Potter and his friends. They would often tease her incessantly and when she needed to get away, she would come here."  
  
"How do you know that, Professor?"  
  
Dumbledore smiled gently. "I used to come visit her here, too. Well, I will let you get back to your reading." It took great effort but soon the elderly man was heaved to his feet and he turned his back. "Good day, Miss Granger."  
  
"Good day, Professor," Hermione replied quietly. She glanced around the stacks of books surrounding her. On the far wall, only a few inches away from her, she could see an engraved message: L.E. + R.L. Curious as to what it meant, she leaned closer, only to notice that R.L. has been scratched out and J.P. replaced it faintly. Putting two and two together, Hermione figured that L.E. was Lily Evans and J.P. was James Potter, but who was R.L. and what significance did he play in Harry's mother's life? Deciding to press further on the issue later on, Hermione went back to her self-wallowing and picked up her quill again. It was going to be a long day.  
  
Hermione didn't come face to face with Draco until almost two weeks after the initial announcement. She was walking through the courtyard, desperate to get away from the prying stares, when she almost ran headlong into Malfoy and his goonies, Crabbe and Goyle.  
  
"Assaulting me already?" Malfoy cried, rubbing his forehead where Hermione had bumped him. "Don't take it out on me, Granger, I don't want to be stuck with you any more than you do with me."  
  
"You have no idea," Hermione muttered angrily, rubbing her own head. "Now get out of my way."  
  
"Hold it!" Draco cried, and Goyle pushed her back in front of him. "Father's been on my back to do this for a long time now and since we're both here, now's a good a time as any." He reached into his robes and fully expecting him to brandish his wand, Hermione reached for her own. But instead, Malfoy pulled out a small beige box. He opened it and grabbed a ring in his fist. "Hold this," he said, thrusting the box at Crabbe. Bending down on one knee he said, "Willyoumarryme?"  
  
"Huh?"  
  
Draco rolled his eyes. "Will you marry me?"  
  
"No."  
  
"You don't have a choice."  
  
"Then why did you ask me?"  
  
"Look!" Draco stood up angrily, the ring still clutched in his fist. "Father's been after me to 'properly' ask you so the least you can do is go along with it!"  
  
"I'll never go along with it," Hermione said defiantly. She spit in his face before storming away quickly. "Of all the nerve, especially in front of all those people," Hermione muttered to herself. She hurried along the dark corridors, noticing that the sun was fading fast outside and storm clouds were rolling in. "Might snow later on," she thought. "After all, it is almost March. Winter isn't usually gone this early." She entered the common room, after arguing with the Fat Lady for almost ten minutes, and flopped down in a chair, exhausted.  
  
"What's going on now?" Ron asked from behind her. "First you go and get engaged without me and now you're ignoring me?"  
  
Hermione spun around in her seat. "Sorry, Ron!" she cried, looking at him seated in the chair behind her. "I didn't notice you."  
  
"Of course you didn't!" Ron cried in mock understanding. "I guess you were too busy thinking about your upcoming wedding to snot face! Silly me, how could I even dream of getting involved? I'm sorry, Mrs. Malfoy, I'll just step out of your way!" He got up and stalked out of the room, leaving Hermione speechless.  
  
"Jerk!" she yelled after him. "Like I have a choice!" She leaned back heavily in the soft chair, feeling the tears rush to her eyes.  
  
"He'll get over it," came another voice from behind her and she sat up again.  
  
"How many of you are there back there?" Hermione cried as Harry came into view.  
  
"Just me, now that you've scared away Ron," Harry joked. "Seriously, he'll come to grips with it sooner or later."  
  
"Well, I won't," Hermione grumbled as she slid down in her chair again. She saw Harry come around her seat and sit down on the table in front of her, beside the fireplace. "I just don't understand," she cried, feeling the day's frustrations come to an end. "Why me? There are loads of other pureblood girls in this school; why me? I'm nothing special!"  
  
"Maybe not to Malfoy, but you are to us," Harry said soothingly. "Especially to Ron. He really cares about you."  
  
"Doesn't he see that I care about him, too?" Hermione cried desperately. "I've always cared about him."  
  
"You two really show it, with all your arguing and bickering," Harry said sarcastically.  
  
Hermione gave him a withering glance. "Enough," she said bitterly, feeling sudden rage come pouring into her veins. "I know you've been through a lot, Harry, but you're most definitely not the only one with problems." Feeling that she may have gone a step or two out of bounds, she silenced herself, expecting Harry's wrath.  
  
Instead, she got a weak smile. "I know," he said calmly. "I wouldn't want to marry Draco, either."  
  
"Listen, Harry, I have a favour to ask." Hermione decided to ask while the going was good.  
  
"What's that?" Harry had suddenly become very interested in a thread on the sofa.  
  
"Do you have anything that belonged to your mother that you might be willing to lend me?"  
  
"Like what?" Harry's interest was diverted to Hermione as she searched for a reason to justify her request. "I have a few of her journals and such but other than that, nothing."  
  
"Journals!" Hermione's eyes lit up. "You mean like a diary, right?"  
  
"Yeah."  
  
"Could I borrow them sometime? If you don't mind, that is." She suddenly felt very shy and debated telling Harry why she wanted them, but much to her gratitude, he did not ask. He went back to examining the sofa and nodded, telling her he would search for them sometime soon. 


	3. Symbolism

Draco approached Hermione again when there was only two months of school left. Hermione had been keeping herself busy and her mind active, veering away from any thoughts that involved the Malfoys. She cringed when she noticed him approaching her deserted table in the library, fearing that he would try to curse her or something else childish. She hadn't spoken with him since last time when she spit in his face.  
  
"Hello," he said, pulling up a chair beside her and straddling it, resting his arms on the back. Crabbe and Goyle weren't with him this time and he was once again carrying the beige jewellery box. "Can't run from me this time, can you?"  
  
"I can try," she replied stoutly. "This table flips easier than you would think."  
  
A deep, throaty laugh emitted from his mouth. "I'd like to see you try," he said, leaning towards her. "Anyway, Father was rather disappointed that I didn't complete my mission, if you will, last time and he made it perfectly clear that I get it done this time."  
  
"Good luck," Hermione replied bitterly, going back to her work. "You'll need my hand in order to do that."  
  
"Shouldn't be a problem," Malfoy said, reaching for her hand. She slapped his outstretched hand hard and he pulled back with a yelp of pain. "What'd you do that for?"  
  
"If I wanted you to touch me, I would invite you," she told him coldly. "Seeing as there was no invitation, I would greatly appreciate it if you would keep your slimy hands off me."  
  
"Just you wait," he snarled, standing up as Crabbe and Goyle approached his side. "Just you wait, Granger. I'll have you soon and you will wear the damn ring." He slammed the little jewellery box closed for emphasis and stormed away.  
  
Hermione shook her head. "Just like a child," she muttered. "Maybe Lucius ought to pay me for babysitting instead." She continued to focus on her work, but not for long. Her mind was reeling and her heart was racing. There was no way she was going to be able to get anything done in this state, so she packed up her things and walked towards the doorway.  
  
But before she exited the room, she made a quick stop in the library stacks, near her small, deserted corner. Throwing her stuff to the ground, she ran her fingers lightly over the etched initials in the wall. When J.P. had replaced R.L., his initials were done much lighter than R.L.'s giving off the impression that R.L. had been more important than J.P.  
  
"Not possible," Hermione thought to herself, gathering her things again. "Harry's mother wouldn't be like that." Laughing quietly to herself, she stood up and left for the common room where she found her two best friends talking quietly together.  
  
"I'll tell you later," Ron said to Harry when he saw Hermione. He got up and left quickly, leaving Hermione to sit in his chair and stick her tongue out at his departing back.  
  
"How goes the battle?" Harry asked, leaning back in his chair, folding a piece of paper in his hands.  
  
"Same as always," Hermione replied. "What's that?"  
  
"This?" Harry held up the paper. "A letter from Remus. He's been writing me more since, well, you know, fifth year and all."  
  
"Oh." Hermione lowered her head. She was happy that Harry was able to bring about the subject of Sirius' death, but she hated that he couldn't mention it. He once told her that saying it would make it final, and he wasn't ready for that yet. "What did he have to say?"  
  
"Not much." Harry fingered the paper thoughtfully. "He met a girl somewhere in his travels. Says she's really nice and I should meet her this summer." He let out a snort of disapproval. "He's not my godfather, nor is he related to me. Why should I go meet his girlfriend, like I'm supposed to approve of her?"  
  
"Then don't go," Hermione answered simply. "Tell him you're busy."  
  
"I might do that." Yawning, Harry glanced at his watch. "I think I'll lie down before supper. Have fun reading." He stood up and it was only then that Hermione realized she had opened a book during their conversation.  
  
"Get it together, Hermione," she muttered to herself, slamming the book closed. Sighing heavily, she leaned back against the chair, welcoming it's comforts. Within seconds, she was asleep.  
  
When she opened her eyes next, Ron was staring down at her. She jumped slightly, but didn't sit up.  
  
"You're awake," he said monotonously. "Oh."  
  
"You startled me," she said, sitting up slowly as he moved away. She stretched her arms and noticed the darkness outside. "What time is it?"  
  
"Close to midnight," came the uninterested reply.  
  
"And no one woke me?"  
  
"I had no reason to." Ron's voice was bitter and hurt and although Hermione couldn't blame him, she still felt the full sting of his words.  
  
"Look, Ron, we need to talk." She moved to the edge of the chair she was sitting in and held her hands out to his.  
  
"What's to talk about?" Ron moved away, staring hard at her. "I'm going up to bed. Don't follow me." He left the room, stomping his feet on every stair he passed.  
  
"I have no reason to!" she hollered up the stairs at him and received an unfriendly gesture in return. "Idiot," she muttered to herself, feeling her stomach rumble. "No one wakes me for dinner, it's late, I've slept all night and now I won't be tired." Despite her internal protests, she yawned and found herself thinking about heading up to bed. She tried to sneak up the stairs quietly, but they creaked and she was sure she was waking everyone in the tower.  
  
Parvati and the others were already asleep when Hermione climbed into bed and she was grateful for not having to talk to them. Every time Lavender Brown saw Hermione, she would ask how 'Mrs. Malfoy' was doing, knowing fully that it incensed Hermione terribly.  
  
"Sorry," she had giggled once. "Are you going to make it Granger- Malfoy?" She burst into giggles, heedless of the nasty looks she was receiving from Parvati.  
  
Although she had slept for numerous hours already, Hermione found sleep easily in her own bed. She drifted in and out of dreams, making it hard to concentrate on sleep. At one point, when she was in that awake, but asleep state, she distinctly heard Lavender whisper, "Sleeping Malfoy's back."  
  
"Lavender, grow up! Can't you see that those childish taunts hurt her?"  
  
"Who's childish, Parvati? That girl is lucky! She gets to marry one of the best-looking boys at Hogwarts and she's whining about it! She's the one who's being childish."  
  
"Maybe she doesn't see it that way, Lavender. Now go back to sleep and mind your own business. It's not you marrying Draco."  
  
"Unfortunately," Lavender muttered before silence set in once more. Hermione felt rage invade her dreams, but she smiled sleepily at Parvati's defence. It was nice to have someone that understood.  
  
The next morning at breakfast, Hermione received an owl from her parents. "They're coming to see me on Saturday!" she cried to Harry. "I don't want to see them!" She slammed the paper down on the table, causing several people to jump.  
  
"Where are you going with them?" Harry asked nonchalantly.  
  
"Hogsmeade."  
  
"I'll go with you, Hermione," offered Ginny Weasley. Although Ron was no longer talking to Hermione, his sister had been overly helpful, offered to assist Hermione in any way she could. "We'll get you through it with no problems."  
  
Hermione smiled weakly. "Thanks, but I think this is something I have to do on my own, Ginny." She sighed again. "But you could talk to your brother for me. He's still ignoring me and treating me like it's my fault."  
  
"He's really hurt," Ginny confessed, lowering her head. "Although he knows it's not your fault, he thinks there's something else you could have done to stop it."  
  
"There's still time," Hermione said, eyeing Draco across the room. He was chatting with a few friends and kept glancing at Hermione, looking away when he saw that she was looking back.  
  
"I managed to find those diaries you wanted to look through," Harry piped up causing Ginny to cast a wary glance at Hermione.  
  
"Um, thanks Harry," Hermione muttered, looking down at her hands. She wasn't sure that she wanted Ginny to know what she was doing. With the talk of the upcoming wedding and Draco's insistent queries as to why she won't wear his ring, Hermione had almost forgotten about asking Harry for Lily's old diaries. "I'll get them from you later."  
  
The spring weather was in full bloom and the April sunshine felt wonderful on Hermione's face as she ventured outside. All the gloom of that February day when she was betrothed to Draco was whisked away with the fluttering of butterflies and the songs of the birds. She sat down by the lake, alone and loving it, thinking about her future. What would she say to her parents who had done her so much wrong? How could she face them knowing they agreed to place her in such doom? Shaking her head, she wished that she could be a figure of someone's imagination, able to come and go as she pleased. She was not looking forward to the meeting in Hogsmeade at all.  
  
It always amazed Hermione how when you were dreading things time hurried by, causing the trepidation to grow rapidly. Her stomach was filled with butterflies on the morning of the trip to Hogsmeade. She dressed quickly, and early, eager to avoid Lavender when she awoke. Hermione took it as a personal insult that Lavender thought she was lucky to be marrying someone like Draco Malfoy. Sure, he could be cute, but it was his personality that caused Hermione to dislike him so intently.  
  
Hogsmeade always looked beautiful in the springtime but Hermione didn't dwell. She hurried along, her head down, her hooded cloak protecting her from the world. She knew it was insecurity but she felt everyone in the village was staring at her as she passed by. After what seemed like an eternity, she arrived at the door of the Three Broomsticks. Pulling the hood off, she went inside, searching for her parents among the crowded tables.  
  
"Hermione! Over here!" She looked to her left and saw her father standing on his chair, waving his arms around like an idiot. "Hermione! We're over here! To your left!"  
  
"Dad, will you sit down?" she hissed as she approached the table. She pulled at his sleeve. "You look ridiculous."  
  
"Hello darling," her mother greeted and Hermione noticed that she looked much more tired than she had last time. Why was it that everyone around her seemed so exhausted while Hermione was so full of life and energy? Was she draining the people around her?  
  
"Hi Mum. Dad, quit waving your hands, I'm here now."  
  
"We're so happy to see you again," Mrs. Granger said, leaning in to kiss her daughter on the cheek. When she pulled back, she glanced at Hermione's hand in passing. "Darling, where's your ring?"  
  
"Still in the jewellery box," Hermione said, signalling for the waitress. "I haven't worn it yet."  
  
"Hasn't Draco presented it to you yet?"  
  
"Just a Butterbeer, thanks. Yes, Mum, he tried, but he kept getting hurt." Hermione smiled at the memories. "I don't really want it anyway."  
  
"But Hermione, you're going to marry him!"  
  
"I'm aware of that, Mum, trust me I'm aware of that. I just don't need a material item to remind me of that."  
  
Mrs. Granger shook her head. "I don't understand you sometimes, Hermione. You're going to marry one of the most well-known names in the wizarding world and you can't even embrace the chance!"  
  
"Maybe she's not ready to get married," piped up Mr. Granger and his wife shot him a dirty look. "Well, she's only seventeen, Krystal."  
  
"Edward, it's not as if the wedding is tomorrow. The actual date won't be for probably another three or four years!"  
  
"Then why was this all arranged now?"  
  
"Edward, I don't think we should discuss this right now."  
  
Hermione was watching her parents with hawk-like eyes, intent on why her father was so set against the marriage. Whatever the reason, she felt an immediate rush of gratitude towards him for it.  
  
"Krystal, I just don't understand. Whatever you can tell me, you can tell my little girl." Mr. Granger sat up with a great deal of pride and Mrs. Granger bristled.  
  
"Fine. It was so she didn't get too attached to that Weasley boy." Mrs. Granger's face was stone cold but her eyes were relenting.  
  
"That Weasley boy? Mum, I like Ron! I don't like Draco! Ron's been one of my best friends for seven years! I care about him! Don't sink to the Malfoys' level when you start going on about proper families and such."  
  
"Really, Krystal, I don't see the problem with little Ryan."  
  
"Ron, Dad."  
  
"Right, Ron. He's a sweet boy and he seems to like our daughter."  
  
"No, Edward. Now shush, here comes Lucius." Mrs. Granger stood to greet the slick haired man and his wormy son. "Lucius! Draco! How nice of you to meet us here today!"  
  
"Pleasure, Krystal, the pleasure's all mine. Draco, I'm sure you remember Hermione."  
  
Draco gave his father a scathing look. "Of course, Dad, I'm not dumb."  
  
"That's debatable," Lucius muttered under his breath but Hermione heard and gave a short chuckle. "Draco has failed to give Hermione the ring, as we previously discussed," Lucius continued, turning his full attention to Mr. and Mrs. Granger. "So we decided that now would be the time."  
  
"Oh, no," Hermione began but Draco got down on one knee and proceeded to repeat himself from before.  
  
"HermioneGrangerwillyoumarryme?"  
  
"Just say yes, sweetheart," Mrs. Granger prompted, looking around at all the faces staring at them.  
  
"This is a bad dream," Hermione told herself. "I'll wake up soon and go downstairs and find the boys and find out that this was all a dream."  
  
"Hurry up, Hermione," urged Mrs. Granger. Hermione's father looked like he wanted to say something, but was determined to keep quiet.  
  
"Yes," Hermione finally whispered, tears rolling down her cheeks. There was no way she could change their minds. This was ridiculous. Draco slipped the ring on her finger and she gave one final loud sob and ran from the tavern, shaking all the way. She ran down the steps towards the pathway that led back to the school. Tripping over a branch along the way, she began to sob even harder.  
  
"Why?" she screamed, pounding the dirt with her fists. "Why me? What's so special about me? I hate you," she cursed at the thoughts of her parents and Lucius Malfoy. "I hate you and I will never forgive you!"  
  
"You think I like it any better than you?" came a voice from behind her. "Well, you're wrong because I don't."  
  
"What are you doing here?" Hermione snarled as Draco appeared from the shadows. She scrambled to stand up and brush the dirt from her clothes.  
  
"Seeing as we're going to be married, Father thought it would be proper if I came after you," he said, leaning against a sole gatepost. "Personally, I don't really care one way or another, but I just wanted to let you know that I don't fancy marrying you, either."  
  
"Good to know," Hermione told him, her face set with determination. She glared at him for a few more moments before he left her alone. She turned back towards the castle and began trudging slowly.  
  
"By the way," came Draco's voice from behind her, "Father's moving the wedding date up. It's going to be just before Christmas this year. See you back at the castle."  
  
Hermione's jaw dropped but she wouldn't give Malfoy the satisfaction of turning around. Instead, she plodded back to the castle, her heavy heart weighing her down. It was as if she didn't have enough with her life changing as it was. Leaving school was going to be one of the hardest things she had ever had to do. Hogwarts had been her life for the past seven years; she would be lost without it. Now she had to move into Malfoy Manor and marrying the slime she had felt such extreme hatred for in seven years. Things just seemed to get better and better. 


	4. Graduation Tears

The days quickly turned into weeks. With Ron not talking to her, Hermione found herself spending more and more time cooped up in her dorm room when Lavender wasn't there. When Hermione had gotten back from Hogsmeade, emotionally and physically exhausted, Lavender had spent a good ten minutes crooning over the ring on Hermione's finger.  
  
"You're so lucky!" she cried. "Marrying a Malfoy; you'll be set for life."  
  
"I can't wait," Hermione replied sarcastically, pulling her hand away from the excited girl. "What I can't wait for most is for when I can go up on top of that hill outside and chuck this baby as far as I can into the water below." She fingered the ring as she spoke, enjoying the astonished look on Lavender's face.  
  
"You wouldn't."  
  
"Care to make a wager, Lavender?"  
  
"You're spoiled, Granger," Lavender complained. "You've got the greatest guy in the world and you're whining about it. Why don't you grow up?" With that she walked away and Hermione felt the tears come to her eyes again.  
  
"Correction, Lavender," she muttered, "I had the greatest guy. Now he won't talk to me."  
  
Harry had given Hermione his mother's diaries a few weeks ago, but with studying for exams and the wedding date being pushed up, Hermione hadn't had time to do so much as glance through them yet. She kept putting it off, wanting to read them when she was alone. Finally, one day in early June, she managed to find a spare second when she wasn't being fitted for a wedding dress or reviewing Transfiguration spells in her mind. She grabbed the three books and sat in her silent corner of the library, flipping through the pages.  
  
A few times, she almost closed the books, thinking it was wrong to be searching through such a personal item, but her glances upon the engraved wall made her curiosity peak. No, she had to know who R.L. was and she had to know soon.  
  
It was a hard decision on how to read the diaries. At first, Hermione just flipped through them absentmindedly, hoping a name somewhere would ring a bell. After awhile of searching that way, she changed her mind and flipped to page one, starting at the beginning. "It's got to be in here somewhere," she said quietly, after getting halfway through the first book without so much as a mention of any names. "What does 'R' stand for anyway? Ryan? Rob? Reed?"  
  
Hermione read the first whole book that day in the library but could not find a thing. The only names she found mentioned were those of the Marauders as Lily described the torments they put her through. I hate that James Potter Lily had written one day during March. Today, while Kaylen and I were walking across the grounds, he managed to hit us with several snowballs. And the best part is, his stupid friends just stood there, laughing! Well, Remus wasn't, but that Sirius Black deserves a good punch. It all okay, though, because as they turned to leave, Kaylen temporarily turned each of them into snowballs themselves. Dumbledore gave her heck for it, but it was fun while it lasted.  
  
Hermione smiled at the references to Harry's Dad and his friends. She wondered if Harry had read these and if not, he might want to, considering they contained a personal insight into his parents' lives at Hogwarts. Tucking all three books away under her robes, she left the library, avoiding Malfoy and his gang down the hallway. She didn't want to face him ever again, but she knew that come the end of the year, she would be leaving school with him to go to Malfoy Manor. It made her feel physically sick when she thought about going to that place, but she knew she had no choice. Something told her Lucius Malfoy would go to any means to get her to marry Draco.  
  
Much to Hermione's dismay, the end of June arrived quickly. She aced all her exams, as usual, but Ron still wasn't speaking to her. It had been a long four months without his friendship, but she assumed that the old saying was true. In hard times, you really did find out who your true friends were. Harry had stuck by her side, but he had been so distant for the past two years that he wasn't much help. Hermione knew that he had his own problems, what with Sirius being gone and Voldemort still on the loose, so she didn't want to pester him too much.  
  
While the girls in Hermione's dorm sat on their bed and planned out their graduation dresses, Hermione sat on hers and planned out her wedding dress. While they discussed post-graduation parties, Hermione planned food for three hundred people at the wedding reception. Well, technically she didn't plan anything. Lucius had it arranged ahead of time and sent to her via owl. She just looked it over and nodded politely.  
  
On the day of graduation, Ron came up to Hermione with a single comment. "Congratulations on everything, Hermione. I hope the rest of your life is just as wonderful as the years here." With that, he turned and walked away, leaving Harry and Ginny staring sadly at Hermione, whose eyes had began to leak solemn tears.  
  
Those weren't the only tears Hermione shed that day. She cried when Professor Dumbledore gave his speech on how proud he was to watch them all bloom and flourish through the years. She cried when Professor McGonagall congratulated them as a graduating class, she cried when Hagrid shed a few giant tears on their behalf and she cried when the rest of the group started cheering and yelling. They had done it. They were leaving Hogwarts forever.  
  
"I'm going to drink so much tonight!" Hermione heard Lavender telling Padma and Parvati. "And then I'm going on a three-year tour around the world, living in some exotic places for certain amounts of time. My parents are planning it all."  
  
"I'm going to post-graduate school at the branch of Hogwarts college," confessed Padma, "but I'm taking a year off first to relax and give myself some time to think. My parents are planning it all."  
  
"Yeah, well my parents have planned my wedding by the end of this year!" Hermione wanted to shout. "When you're touring in North America and you're sitting in the sun being lazy, I'll be working my ass off as a housewife!" But she kept her cool and simply smiled at all the well- wishers.  
  
"We did it!" Harry cried, running up to her. His hair was messier than usual and his glasses were crooked. He hugged her tightly. "We actually lived through our years at Hogwarts! I didn't think I'd see the day."  
  
"You're positive."  
  
"Well, you know, with Voldemort on the loose, I naturally assumed I was going to die by my sixth year. Now I'm out in the real world, so anything's possible, though."  
  
"Harry, don't be so negative." Hermione was becoming frightened at the hopeful look on Harry's face when he spoke of death. "By the way, I'll have your mother's journals back to you by the time I leave."  
  
Harry shrugged. "Don't worry. I'm sure this won't be the last time I'll see you." It was only then that the reality of the situation hit them both. "Hey, no more 'see you after class'."  
  
"And no more 'meet me in the library'."  
  
"No more Potions, Transfiguration, or Charms. No more Snape, McGonagall or Flitwick." Harry's eyes had begun to mist over. "Hermione, this is it. We're out of here."  
  
"I know." Hermione was already crying quietly, the wedding plans forgotten. Forget Malfoy, she was leaving her best friends and the best years of her life. The troll in the bathroom, the Deathday party, all the ghosts, Moaning Myrtle, the expansive library, potent potions, secret passages, midnight talks, midnight adventures, SPEW, and so much more. She was leaving it all behind. She hugged Harry tightly, neither of them wanting to let on their tears.  
  
Four hours later, Hermione was packed and ready to go. She waited patiently in the Entrance Hallway to board the carriage with Malfoy that would take them to the Hogwarts Express. While some were staying late to join parties and such, Harry was leaving at this time, too. He bid Ron farewell in the hallway, promising to visit soon. Hermione's heart wrenched when she saw Ron walk away without so much as looking at her. She fought the tears back this time, not wanting to be a wreck and giving Malfoy something else to base foundation on.  
  
"Are you all set, Miss Granger?" Professor Dumbledore asked, coming up behind her.  
  
"Yes," Hermione answered in a small voice. "Thank you so much for everything you've done for me over the years." She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck.  
  
"You're welcome," the old man whispered back. "Keep in mind, your father is against the wedding and has been from the start."  
  
Hermione pulled back with a quizzical look but Dumbledore went silent as Draco approached.  
  
"Ready to go?" he asked her.  
  
"Does it matter?"  
  
"Not really. Crabbe, Goyle! Get our bags and load them up!" The two oafs fumbled forward and began grabbing the luggage. "Careful!" Malfoy hollered. "Some of that is sacred!"  
  
Hermione turned back to Dumbledore, but he was already out of sight. She quickly hugged Professor McGonagall and tiny Professor Flitwick. "Bye," she whispered, hiding her tears. She fled down the steps before she could turn back and climbed into the carriage. Once everyone else was boarded, the carriages began to move away and Hermione purposely leaned over Malfoy to wave goodbye. And when she leaned back, Hogwarts was gone from her sight as she looked forward to her new life. 


	5. Malfoy Manor

Malfoy Manor was bigger than Hermione had originally expected. Never did she think that the Manor would actually be more like a mansion. Her eyes widened as their carriage (the one they boarded at King's Cross) pulled up in front of the grey stone house.  
  
"Impressive, isn't it?" Draco asked from beside her and Hermione noted the tone of awe in his voice.  
  
"Is it like this every time you arrive home?" she asked, referring to the incredible stirring feeling that was created within her upon sight of the manor.  
  
Draco nodded. "Every glimpse is like the first."  
  
"How poetic," Hermione thought to herself, turning back to the manor. Seconds later their carriage pulled to a halt and she got out, assisted by a man in a chauffeur's uniform. "Thank you," she said, grateful for the help with the long jump from the carriage to solid ground. Once outside, she waited for Draco to exit.  
  
"You can go on up to the house," he said from behind her and she was surprised to hear a note of pleasantness in his voice. "Father will meet you at the gate."  
  
Extremely nervous, Hermione made her ascent up the many stairs to a gate-like archway, which housed a door deep in the back. Suddenly, the great door swung open to reveal Lucius Malfoy. No longer did he wear his intimidating black cloak, but a grey formal suit. His long hair was pulled back into a ponytail as he greeted her.  
  
"Welcome to Malfoy Manor," he said and Hermione noticed that there was no pleasantness in his voice. "While you are here, you will respect my wishes, as well as the other Malfoys in the house. You will have a cleaning lady come in to your room every Thursday morning and tidy things up, if need be. Supper is at six promptly on weekdays and five on the weekends. If you are not there, we will start without you. If you have any questions, you can ask one of the Malfoys later on. You will be staying on the second floor, in the west wing, across from Draco's room. If I catch you out of bed after lights out, which is ten o'clock sharp, you will be punished accordingly. Do I make myself clear?"  
  
"Lay off her, Dad," Draco said, coming up behind Hermione and startling her. "Give her time to digest what you've just said. I've lived here for seventeen years and I still don't understand the rules of the house." He pushed past his father, carrying the luggage, and into the great doorway. "Come on, then," he called to Hermione. "Unless you plan to sleep on the front stoop."  
  
She hurried to catch up with him, sliding by Lucius, whom she could have sworn growled at her. However, she was forced to stop short when she saw the line up of people in front of her.  
  
"Hermione, this is our housing crew," Draco said, gesturing to the line up. "From left to right, we have Matilda, one of our cleaning ladies, Truatt, our butler, Elena, another cleaning lady, Ulceria, our maid, Drutenda, our cook, Cypress, our chauffeur; you met him already, and this fine lady on the end here is Willow, our newest cleaning lady."  
  
Each of them bowed or curtsied to Hermione as they were introduced and dispersed as Draco dismissed them with a wave of his hand. "Of course, we'll only be here until the wedding. Then Father has gotten us a place of our own. Come on; I'll show you upstairs."  
  
Hermione followed him timidly, jumping at every slight sound. The mansion itself was intimidating with its dark walls and rusted features. She followed closely behind Draco, finding that for once in her life, she was happy he was around. He was a familiar sight in a very strange environment. They finally reached the second landing and Draco led her to the room at the very end, which bore the mark of a truly depressing quarters. "This is your room," he said, swinging the door open fully. "I trust that you will keep it clean, or else Father will come along and chuck everything out the window; trust me, I know from experience."  
  
Hermione smiled slightly at the thought of all of Draco's underclothes strewn across the massive lawn. He caught her grin and smiled back at her. "It wasn't as funny as it may seem. Now, I trust you'll have everything you need for the time being. If you do need anything, however, you can call on me. My room is the one right there." He pointed to the room two doors down on the right side. "Happy unpacking." He closed the door softly behind him as he left, giving Hermione plenty of time to think.  
  
She tossed her suitcases on the bed, which groaned under the weight. Slowly opening one of them, she began going through her things, wondering if it was really worth unpacking fully if they would be moving in a few months anyway. "Do it just in case," she thought to herself. "For all you know, the wedding could be postponed for another three years." Although this was a hopeful thought, Hermione still felt a hollow spot within her soul.  
  
Ron. Harry. Mum. Dad. Why did she have to leave them all? Thoughts of her last moments with Harry at graduation brought heavy tears to her already damp eyes. She hated the fact that he and Ron were going to be at the Burrow later on in the summertime, leaving her alone with the Malfoys. Although, Hermione was convinced that something had happened to Draco on the way back. He seemed nicer, kinder than he had ever been towards her before.  
  
Her first week at the Malfoys was filled with surprises. For one, Draco came down to breakfast the following morning with his hair not pumped full of gel. He caught Hermione staring at him and smiled. "I only wear my hair slicked back for school," he told her casually.  
  
"Do you think it makes you look tougher?"  
  
"Not exactly," was his single reply. He sat down at the table, across from her, and began shovelling cereal into his mouth. Finding him almost human, Hermione began to nibble at her own bowl, determined not to look too content.  
  
"Father says you can use our owl to write to your family," Draco told her on the morning of her third day at Malfoy Manor. "As long as he gets to address the owl on where to go." He lowered his voice. "I don't think he wants you talking to Potter or Weasley." His eyes narrowed when he mentioned Harry's name, but grew strangely triumphant when he mentioned Ron's.  
  
Upstairs, Hermione was unsure of how to start a letter to her parents who had betrayed her. For several moments, she considered declining Lucius' offer to write them. But they'd only get worried and scold her when she finally did write, so she went against her will and sat down at the enormous desk in her room with a large scroll of parchment and a quill. Dipping it slowly in the ink, she put the feather to her lips while she thought.  
  
"Dear Mum and Dad," she scrawled, muttering the words to herself out loud. "I'm finally here at Malfoy Manor and I don't know what to say about the place." She looked up from the desk and searched around the room for something to discuss. "My room here is pretty big," she continued, finding the words pathetic in her own brain. She threw the quill down, tears blinding her sight. There was no way to really express the anger, pain and hatred that was bubbling inside of her. She hated what they had done to her. How could she put into words the sting she felt from her parents' betrayal? Dumbledore had told her that her father was against the whole thing, but why couldn't he do something to stop it? Surely he had equal power over the Malfoys as they had over him. Why couldn't he stop them?  
  
"Hermione!" Draco's voice drifted down the long hallway. "Father's sending the post; get your letter ready!"  
  
"I haven't written it yet!"  
  
"Well, step on it! He won't wait all day!"  
  
"I never asked him to," Hermione muttered under her breath. "Love you guys and I'll write longer soon," she scribbled at the end of the letter, rolling it up and taking it with her into the hallway. Draco stood there, staring at an empty space on the wall.  
  
"Thanks," he said taking the scroll from her. "I'll give it to him now."  
  
"He knows where to find my parents, then?"  
  
"Yeah. I think so. You can do what you want now." With those words, he left her, but not before giving her the same sad look that reflected how she felt on the inside.  
  
July brought with it beautiful sunshine and light breezes that gently caressed your face as soon as you stepped out into the sunlight.. Hermione spent much of her time outside in the sunshine, when not being lectured by Lucius in the sitting room on the rules of the household.  
  
"No eating or drinking in your room, except for water," he dictated, as if he had memorized it from a rulebook. "Not that you have any but no friends are allowed in the house without either my or Mrs. Malfoy's approval. And we trust that you will keep up with your reading, although you are out of school now. We've got word that you're a brilliant girl."  
  
"The best," Draco said from the staircase. Hermione looked up sharply and Draco disappeared around the dark corner quickly.  
  
With all the confusion of the move and the upcoming wedding, Hermione had barely had time to look through Lily's diaries since being leaving school. So one afternoon, after she had been dismissed from what had become daily lectures from Lucius, she escaped into the bright sunshine, eager to leave the dreary house behind, with the three books in her arms.  
  
Once the sunshine hit her face, she dropped to the bench near the little pathway that she hadn't explored yet. Opening the second diary in her lap, she began to lose herself in the world of Harry's mother when she was Lily Evans. Lily talked about the Marauders and how much she hated 'their idiot ringleader, James Potter'.  
  
However, Hermione's mind began to concentrate more as Lily's entries began to focus on Remus Lupin. He's such a sweet guy, she gushed, and I can't believe that he asked me out! Naturally, I accepted. Wait until Kaylen hears about this one!  
  
Remus Lupin had asked out Harry's mother? This news was both surprising and astonishing, not to mention a little confusing. Hermione hurried to read the rest of the entries and her knowledge expanded with each sentence. Remus and I went to Hogsmeade for the one weekend a year when all seventh years are allowed to stay the night. He was so kind and so gentle, except for the one problem that occurred. I didn't notice that it was a full moon; he promised Dumbledore that if he went, he would get away before the full moon dawned but things didn't quite happen that way. If it wasn't for James Potter, I would be dead right now.  
  
"Hermione, Father wants to see you inside for some wedding arrangements." Draco's voice broke through her thoughts and she jumped at the sound. "Sorry to startle you," he said, standing in front of her. "What are you reading?"  
  
"Nothing," she said quickly, slamming the book shut. "What are we planning now?"  
  
"The honeymoon."  
  
Hermione nearly choked on her own thoughts. "Oh," she said subdued, standing to join him. She clutched Lily's books under her robe.  
  
"Don't sound so enthused," Draco said, following her towards the Manor.  
  
Lucius was seated in the sitting room, his wife Narcissa by his side. "Sit down," he said, gesturing to the sofa across from him. Hermione sat at the far end and Draco sat at the end closest to him.  
  
"Now, we have planned out most of the wedding," Lucius began, looking over some notes as if he were conducting a business meeting. "But we seem to have left out a few details. One, what date exactly the wedding will take place. And two, where you will honeymoon."  
  
Hermione squirmed at this last sentence and she caught Draco making similar movements on the other end of the sofa. At least she wasn't alone in the sickening thought. However, she marvelled at the thought of how such a composed, business-like man could plan an entire wedding without thinking of the actual date.  
  
"Mrs. Malfoy and I were thinking September 4th," Lucius continued, unaware of the faces the two teenagers in front of him were making. "And you will leave for the honeymoon on September 6th. Where you want to go is your choice."  
  
"Gee, thanks, Dad," Draco muttered, but Hermione's mind was still circling around the previous statement.  
  
"September!" she cried. "Of this year?"  
  
"Yes, Miss Granger," Lucius replied in his maddening voice. "As in the month after next."  
  
"Why so soon?"  
  
"We feel that it's not necessary to waste time with a long engagement."  
  
Hermione's rage temporarily blinded her. "What about what I think? Don't I count?"  
  
Lucius looked perplexed. "Do you want the truth, Miss Granger, or the story?"  
  
Hermione went silent for a moment. "What?"  
  
"You do count, Miss Granger, in the on the whole, but on its own merits, no you're opinion does not count."  
  
Speechless, Hermione mouthed silent words at the couple sitting across from her. She felt her anger build up and reach such a point that she almost leapt off the sofa and directly at Lucius' throat.  
  
"Give her a break, Dad," piped up Draco and all three parties looked at him in surprise. "First you drill her with rules that I've never even heard of before, and then you practically imprison her on the manor grounds. I think you should let her have a say."  
  
Lucius' eyes were planting holes in Draco. "Don't you ever speak back to me again," he snarled through gritted teeth. "You have no right to speak to me in that condescending tone."  
  
"But you can talk like that to me?"  
  
The simple question sent Lucius into a fit of rage. "That's it!" he roared, standing up from the sofa, knocking over the coffee table in the process. "I've had it with you! I try to help you by finding you a decent wife and this is how you repay me. Well, that's just fine!"  
  
"What are you going to do, Dad? Kick me out?" Draco wore a self- satisfied smile and seemed to take enjoyment out of tormenting his father. "Come on," he said to Hermione as he stood up. "We're obviously not wanted here during the planning of our wedding." He emphasized a few words to make his point clear, then grabbed Hermione's hand and pulled her outside, leaving Lucius fuming in the sitting room. 


	6. Unwanted News

"That was pretty cool," Hermione confessed as the two of them sat on the bench outside the manor. "I never thought you would stand up to your own father like that."  
  
"I know, it's impressive," Draco said in a mock tone of superiority. "He's been itching to get at me with his wand for years."  
  
"You mean kill you?" Hermione was horrified but Draco's laughter stopped her from crying aloud.  
  
"Not kill me," he assured her. "More like give me a pair of antlers, or stick a permanent sign on me that reads 'Bad Son'. Either way, it doesn't bother me."  
  
"Your mother seems, well, odd," Hermione tentatively said, for lack of better words.  
  
"You're being kind," Draco replied bitterly. "She does everything Father says, follows him everywhere. It's kind of sick, if you think about it. The woman can't think for herself."  
  
Hermione nodded, looking down on the ground. Slowly, she turned her eyes upwards to Draco, who was sitting so casually on the bench beside her. His hair was falling over one of his eyes and he had both arms stretched out over the back of the bench. Hermione had leaned forward to avoid his touch, but sat back, figuring eventually she would have to get used to him.  
  
"It's getting late," Draco said suddenly, standing up and stretching. "I think I'll go to bed soon."  
  
"It's barely even nine."  
  
"Well I like to get an early night's sleep." He smiled softly at her, almost thoughtfully, before he left. "Don't worry about Dad," he told her quietly. "He'll get over it eventually." He winked at her and left her in the dark, feeling lost and confused.  
  
Hermione received an answer back from her parents the following Monday morning. She eagerly tore open the envelope, scanning it quickly for news on Ron or Harry. To her disappointment, the only reference was when her mother spoke of going into town. "We saw your friends, Harry and Ron, but I don't think they recognized us. They were having a good time, staring in the windows of the Quidditch shop."  
  
Hermione couldn't help but feel a little let down that Ron and Harry wouldn't have recognized her own parents. After all, they had met them several times before. But her spirits lifted when she saw that they had sent Hermione's own owl, Gadget. Quickly, before anyone else came downstairs, she hurried up to her room, with Gadget on her arm.  
  
"Sit quietly," she told the owl as she sat at her desk and pulled out the parchment and a quill. Quickly, she scribbled out a note to Harry, explaining what was happening and to tell Ron she sent her love. With tears in her eyes, she told him she was thinking of them every day and hoped to see them soon. "Love, Hermione," she wrote, soft tears spotting the page and smearing the ink. She rolled the letter up and tied it to Gadget's leg.  
  
"Be careful," she told him before letting him loose out of her window. "Make sure you bring back a reply!" After she watched Gadget sail out of sight, she collapsed on her bed, sobbing heavily. The strain of a wedding was too much on most adults; how was she, a seventeen-year old girl, supposed to handle it? The thought was almost too ridiculous to comprehend, a seventeen-year old girl getting married. How dumb was that idea? She could barely look after herself, let alone a husband.  
  
"Are you okay?" Draco's voice floated through the door, full of concern. "Drutenda said you had come downstairs for breakfast, but hurried away awfully fast."  
  
Could she trust him? Could she tell him that she was trying to correspond with Harry? Draco had been considerably nicer during these past few weeks, but could it all be an act, just to keep an eye on her? Would he run to Daddy as soon as she told him?  
  
"I'm fine," she said, sniffling. "I was just a little tired, that's all, so I came back up to lie down for a bit."  
  
"Okay," he replied, sounding unconvinced. "Well, if you need anything, you know where I'll be." His footsteps echoed away and she lay back on her bed, grateful for the narrow escape.  
  
Gadget returned with a reply that very evening. She and Draco had been taken to see their future house that day, the home that Hermione would help maintain after they had been married. It wasn't just a bad dream anymore; she was going to marry Draco Malfoy. At times, it didn't seem real, but then reality would come crashing down on her peaceful world and destroy all the inner hopes she had.  
  
As soon as Gadget flew through her open window, she tore the envelope from his leg and opened it eagerly. "That was quick," she thought to herself. But instead of Harry's handwriting, she noticed a handwriting she had never seen before.  
  
"Nice try," the note read, "but I thought I warned you about trying to sneak notes out of your room."  
  
"Lucius," she muttered, crumpling the note in her hand. What was he doing, spying on her window? It made her sick to think of what he had been doing, but she ignored the fact and continued on with her evening routine, pretending that she hadn't sent a thing.  
  
The only thing that kept Hermione's sanity during the long, lonely days at Malfoy Manor was Lily's diaries. She had managed to keep them away from Lucius' prying eyes and was grateful that there was no way he could take them away from her. Often, she would sneak them out to the garden and instead of read them, just flip through the pages casually, thinking of how it must have been for Lily, being torn between James Potter and Remus Lupin. Having seen only pictures of Harry's father, Hermione found herself rooting for Lupin. Although she knew the outcome, she enjoyed reading of how Lupin had made Lily feel.  
  
We broke up, she wrote one day. Remus was afraid that he was going to injure me when he transformed during the full moon. No matter how much I tried to persuade him that he wouldn't, he insisted that it was for the best. It kills me every time I kiss James because I know that Remus is the one I should really be with. He loves me. And I love him.  
  
Each day, Lily's writings got more and more detailed. She often talked about how rich Lupin made her feel and how she never thought James could match up to him. I often wonder if Remus wanted to get rid of me so he pawned me off on James. I mean, it's likely because Remus is a popular guy. A Prefect, good-looking, a great sense of humour and he's fun to be around. That's a very rare combination, especially since he's mature, too, not at all like James. James is fun to be around and incredibly good- looking, but I love Remus! My heart will always belong to him.  
  
Lily's words often brought tears to Hermione's eyes, for she could relate to what Lily had gone through. She had been forced to give up the one she loved in order to better herself. Hermione knew that deep down inside, some part of her truly loved Ron. But her dilemma was much more prominent than that. Draco's sense of kindness and well being made Hermione rethink ever going against him. She began to enjoy his company and look forward to the time they would spent together. Away from school, he really was the perfect gentleman and Hermione liked it. As much as her heart strayed away to Ron, she always managed to bring it back to the place she had deemed 'New Home'. Malfoy Manor had been her home for almost two months now and it was time she started facing up to it. But there was still the matter of Draco.  
  
Two days later, however, all thoughts involving the wedding and Draco were erased from her mind. She received an owl in the early hours of the morning, telling her something she most definitely did not want to hear.  
  
She awoke to a soft pecking sound that sounded an awful lot like water dripping from a faucet. Opening her eyes slowly, she was greeted by the sight of Harry's large, snowy white owl, Hedwig, at the window. She was flapping her wings impatiently so Hermione hurried to open the window for her. She swooped inside, hooting softly, and Hermione hushed her.  
  
"If Draco's father catches you, he'll kill the both of us," she told the owl quietly. Quickly she untied the letter from the owl's leg and stroked her gently while she read the letter. Her heart sank at the first sentence.  
  
"Hermione, this is something you are not going to want to know, but since I know you still care about Ron, I will tell you. He was in an accident recently. Mr. Weasley got another car, but didn't bewitch this one to fly. Ron decided one day, on a dare from the twins that he was going to try and drive the car across their lawn. Of course, the only car he's ever driven was the Ford Anglia, and that was in the air. He wasn't used to dodging around all the objects on the ground and managed to crash into the empty henhouse on their property.  
  
"He's alright, but the doctors are keeping him at St. Mungo's for awhile, just to be sure. He's been asking for you, Hermione, so we would all really appreciate it if you could find some way to come visit him, even for a short period of time. He's really out of it, but he keeps saying that he wants to see you and he has something to tell you. Send a reply back with Hedwig as soon as you can. I'm at the Burrow right now. Love, Harry."  
  
Tears formed in Hermione's eyes. Ron had been in an accident and was asking to see her? The last time they saw each other, he didn't breathe so much as a word to her, yet now he wanted to talk? And how was she supposed to get there? Lucius didn't want her even corresponding with Harry and Ron, let alone going to visit them. No, it was most definitely out of the question to ask him. Even if Ron was seriously hurt, she doubted that Lucius would be kind enough to let her go see him. It seemed almost hopeless.  
  
Then it dawned on her: Draco! He had been a little more tolerable since they arrived at Malfoy Manor; maybe he could find a way to get her to St. Mungo's. If only she had taken her Apparation test before she left school, she could apparate in the hospital. But she had been foolish enough to keep pushing it back, and now she was stranded.  
  
Grabbing her quill and parchment from her desk, she sat on her bed, using a book to write on, and wrote a quick note back to Harry. "Harry, I don't know how I will get there, but I will try to find a way. Tell Ron not to worry and I hope I will see him soon. Lucius doesn't want me even talking to you guys, so I'm going to try and talk to Draco to see if he can help me. I'll let you know for sure soon. Love, Hermione."  
  
She tied the letter to Hedwig's leg and whispered to her gently. "Be careful, Hedwig, don't let Lucius see you." She carried Hedwig to the open window and watched as the great white snowy owl soared through the sky and over the treetops and out of sight. Sighing, she decided that there was nothing left to do but to wait for Draco to wake up and ask him how she could get out of the house.  
  
His reaction was nothing like she had expected. "There is a way," he had agreed slowly. Hermione, who had her case all prepared and was ready to argue, stopped short.  
  
"What?"  
  
"There is a way," Draco repeated, looking thoughtful. The two of them were sitting outside on the bench later that day and Hermione had approached the subject tentatively. "But it's getting around Father that's going to be the problem."  
  
"That's what I'm afraid of," she muttered miserably. "Tell me if it will be too much trouble and I'll find my own way."  
  
"It's not too much trouble," Draco said, still looking rather thoughtful. "It's more complicated than anything." He leaned closer to her, resting his elbows on his knees. "There's a secret passage under the mansion that leads directly to the field outside the hospital. It was built in case one day one of us needed to get to the hospital and didn't want to be seen."  
  
"Boy, you guys really have thought of everything."  
  
Draco shrugged. "I guess. Anyway, the passageway is concealed behind the painting in the main foyer, you know the one of my great-aunt that looks like she's always got a lemon in her mouth?"  
  
Hermione giggled. "Yeah, I know that one. The other day, she told me that I looked sour."  
  
"Right. Anyway, we just need to get past her, because she will start screaming for my father and mother if she sees us trying to get through there."  
  
"Us?"  
  
"Well, yeah. I'm not letting you go alone. Besides, I know the way," he added quickly, but Hermione saw him blush. "We could go later on at night and spent the night in town."  
  
"Are you crazy?" Hermione screeched. "If your father catches us, we'll be slaughtered!"  
  
"That's why we don't get caught," Draco said, leaning even closer to her and smiling. For a split second, Hermione was almost sure he was going to kiss her. She prepared herself to pull back but instead, Draco sat up straight. "If we're going to do it, we had better do it soon."  
  
"Yeah," Hermione said absentmindedly. She wasn't sure how Ron would react to Draco showing up with her at his hospital bedside. Whatever he wanted to tell her was obviously a private matter or else he would have written it in a letter.  
  
"Tonight." Draco's voice yanked her out of her thoughts and she stared at him blankly. "Tonight," he repeated in the same triumphant tone. "Tonight, we'll wait until everyone has gone to bed. Usually around midnight, Great Aunt Rose takes a trip up to the third landing to visit her brother. We'll wait in the kitchen until she's gone, then make a quick dash for it. We'll stay somewhere in the town and wait until the hospital opens in the morning."  
  
"You've been thinking this through," Hermione said, impressed. She smiled her approval, trying to think of a light way to break it to Draco that she didn't want him around when she saw Ron. He was being so helpful and she didn't want to hurt him. "Look, about when we get to the hospital," she began but he cut her off.  
  
"I'll wait outside," he told her, smiling. "I won't intrude on that, don't worry. Besides I don't think Potter and Weasley will want to see me." Hermione was surprised to hear the amount of hatred in his voice when he said their names. It had seemed so long ago when they had all been enemies at school. She remembered times when he had called her a Mudblood and how she absolutely despised him for it. The amount of rage and hatred that had flowed through her veins was similar to that of the pain she had felt when her mother told her she agreed with the pre-arranged marriage.  
  
For the rest of the day, Hermione spent restless hours in her room, going through Lily's diaries. She was finally on the third book and Lily had married James and just found out she was pregnant with Harry. I can't believe I'm starting a family with the man I once despised, she wrote in her careful, neat writing. Any day now, I expect Sirius and Peter to jump out from somewhere and tell me that it's all a joke and that James doesn't love me. I expect them to say that it was all a cruel joke and now I have to raise this baby by myself because James is just childish enough to go back and choose his friends over me. I knew I should have stayed with Remus.  
  
Hermione felt the sting of these words. It was like Lily didn't love James; but she had to, didn't she? Hermione had tried telling herself since February that you had to marry someone you loved, or else the marriage wasn't real? But how did Lily's situation differ from Hermione's? It didn't. Both girls had given up the man they truly loved for someone they, or others, had deemed more appropriate for them. Hermione could relate to the pain Lily was feeling, in some extent, so she continued to read on.  
  
Speaking of Remus, I received a letter from him the other day. He wrote both James and I but enclosed a tightly bound letter that only I could open. In the letter to the both of us, he spoke of how he was so happy for us to be starting a family and how he couldn't wait to see the baby when he or she is born. But his letter to me was filled with lustful comments about how he still loves me and every day he regrets the decision we both made. 'Lily, if I could do things over again, I would,' he wrote, 'but the past is the past and we have to move on. I still love you and I always will, please remember that.' And I will remember that, because I still love him, too. 


	7. St Mungo's

Surprised by Lily's revelation that she still loved Remus, even after marrying James, Hermione spent the rest of the afternoon in a stupor. When suppertime rolled around, Draco knocked on the door, but Hermione politely declined the invitation to join them, claiming she wasn't hungry.  
  
"I know you're nervous about tonight," Draco whispered through the keyhole, "but you'll have to trust me. I know what I'm doing."  
  
Hermione giggled to herself. If only Lucius had heard that conversation, he might be thinking differently about placing the two of them in such close sleeping quarters. She continued to flip through Lily's diary, which was filled with details of how she felt and how much sleep she felt she was losing.  
  
Voldemort's on the loose and he's like a crazed maniac. I don't know where to turn anymore. He's turning all of us against one another. I find myself looking at James, thinking secretly he could be working undercover for him. Of course, I know most of it is the hormones and the raging emotions I'm experiencing, but it scares me. What if he comes after us? What if he gets the baby? I hate all these up-in-the-air scenarios. 'What if, what if, what if?' Who cares anymore?  
  
That was the end of that entry and the next was on August 5. I couldn't be happier, Lily wrote, which Hermione found an incredible contradiction to her previous entry. I had a baby boy on July 31. James and I named him Harry. Harry James Potter. It suits him. He's got dark hair and soft eyes. Although he's still young, I can tell that he's going to be a good baby. Already, he doesn't cry a whole lot, but he could still be getting used to us. We're quite the bunch to get used to. Mundungus came by to visit us and Harry began to scream as soon as he came near him. I don't blame him because poor Dung can be a little out of bounds sometimes. Sirius came by to visit his godson and Peter accompanied him. We had a very fun-filled afternoon, sharing memories and great stories. Harry took to Sirius right away and I can tell that the two of them are going to have a very special relationship.  
  
I was a little disappointed that Remus didn't drop by. Of course, it's a full moon soon, so I can understand why, but it still upsets me. Naturally, I assume he's a little upset, too, thinking about seeing the son of the woman he loves when the boy's not his. I know in his heart, Remus will treat Harry like the son he never had, but it's not the same. James is as caring as a father can get, but I still worry about his maturity level. When his friends arrived, they spent ten minutes in the washroom together, shooting wads of wet paper onto the ceiling with their wands. I was going to kill him.  
  
Hermione laughed at this thought. She found herself being pulled in and becoming more and more captivated at the thought of Harry as a baby. It gave her something to think about and get her mind off of poor Ron for a few hours. Nighttime drew closer, but Draco still hadn't come to rescue her from her room yet. She heard Lucius and Narcissa go to bed, with Lucius muttering angrily under his breath about Hermione not showing up at supper. Rolling her eyes, she continued to read about Harry's adventures as a baby and Lily's growing worry over Voldemort.  
  
I'm beginning to think that the Order is not doing any good. Poor Alastor Moody. He's been working overtime lately for the Order, and the Ministry, and James is busting his behind trying to get the safety report done. Albus Dumbledore keeps trying to contact me about something he deems 'rather important' but we can never seem to get a hold of one another.  
  
Harry's sitting up on his own now. He's such a sweetie. Whenever James or I come into his view, his face lights up and he grins like crazy for at least ten minutes. Everyone keeps saying how he's such a happy baby. All of our neighbours in Godrics' Hollow are thrilled with the new addition. Mrs. McFlaherty told me that the 'last additions' to the neighbourhood was when James and I moved in. It's nice to feel so welcome.  
  
Hermione skipped a few pages because Lily had begun to go on about the other neighbours and what they were like. "I'll come back to those pages," Hermione promised herself. "Later on." She continued to scan the pages for Lupin's name until she came across one rather interesting entry.  
  
He came to visit me last night while James was at work. Not Remus. Not Sirius. Not Peter. Voldemort. I nearly screamed when I opened the door to get some fresh air and there he was, staring me in the face. Forget scream, I nearly dropped dead from fright. He started talking something about prophetic visions and whatnot, so naturally I assumed that he was crazier than people made him out to be. He started to bring Harry into it and I threatened to scream as loud as I possibly could. 'Go ahead,' he told me. Then he raised his wand. 'I dare you.' I remembered what Dumbledore told me about Voldemort once being called Tom Riddle and that Riddle was very childish at school. So I decided to be childish myself and slam the door in his face. I knew it only angered him, but I didn't care. I fully expected him to break down the door, but instead, I saw him walk back down the drive and out onto the street. He looked so odd; I wanted to throw every heavy object I could find at him. As an alternative, I dropped to my knees and sobbed heavily. I never told James what happened last night.  
  
Hermione hadn't realized that she was holding her breath until then. She let out a heavy sigh with the breath and stared at the pages. "Wow," she muttered. She didn't know what she'd do if she opened her front door and Voldemort stood on the front stoop. Scream and faint came to mind, along with a few other choice options. She kept reading until her eyes grew sore. She was nearing the empty pages she saw at the back of the book and decided to put it away and save those for another day. Right now, she had to focus on her strength that would get her from Malfoy Manor to St. Mungo's without any hitches or problems.  
  
As promised, that evening around eleven thirty, Draco appeared at Hermione's door, whispering in the keyhole. "Are you ready?"  
  
"Not really," she muttered to herself but said, "Yeah," aloud. She opened the door to see Draco wearing all black, plus a black hat. "You look like you're going to rob a store," she told him quietly as they sneaked down the creaky staircase.  
  
"Quit bugging," he told her, "or else you will have to go to St. Mungo's yourself." Hermione shut up immediately, not because she wanted Draco's company but because she didn't really want to go on her own. "It's a long hike," he told her as they waited patiently in the kitchen for the woman in the painting to leave. "After all, it's quite a ways away taking streets and everything. But the underground tunnel is a little more direct so it shouldn't be too bad."  
  
Hermione sat on a kitchen chair, her knees feeling weak. Butterflies flitted around her stomach, making her feel unlike herself. Draco kept peering around the corner to see if his great aunt had left yet. Finally, after what had seemed like hours, he said, "The coast is clear." Carefully, he tiptoed around the corner and towards the painting. Slowly shoving it aside on the wall, he motioned for Hermione to go first. "Got everything you need?" he asked as she slid by him.  
  
"Uh huh," she replied, shivering. The tunnel was going to be a lot damper and cooler than she had originally predicted. The smell of mildew was in the air and mould was growing on the walls. Careful not to touch anything, she slowly began to follow the dark corridor, which grew even darker after Draco had slid the portrait back in its place.  
  
"Be careful," he told her, directing her with his hand on the small of her back. She smiled faintly into the darkness, wondering why he was being so caring.  
  
"Why are you acting like you actually give a damn about me?" she asked in a teasing tone.  
  
"Because Father will kill me if you get hurt or lost or something."  
  
"Is it possible to get lost in this tunnel?"  
  
"Would it bother you to know that I wasn't always an only child?"  
  
Hermione shut her mouth, hoping he was kidding and that there were no other lost Malfoy children wandering around the passageway. They were silent for a few moments and Hermione decided, since they had nothing but time, to ask a question that had been plaguing her for quite some time.  
  
"Why is it that when you speak of Lucius to other people, you call him 'Father' but when you talk to him directly, you call him 'Dad'? I would have thought it would have been the other way around."  
  
Draco remained silent for a few moments. "I didn't even know I did that," he finally replied. "I guess it's because when other people talk to me about him, they always refer to him as 'your father' and I guess it just stuck." He continued to lead Hermione down the dreary pathway, his hand still on her back. Somewhere in the distance, Hermione could hear dripping water.  
  
"Where exactly are we?"  
  
"You know that river in the backyard?"  
  
"No way," Hermione said. "There's no way we're under that river."  
  
"No, we're not," Draco replied. "But we're pretty damn close."  
  
Silence reigned for the rest of the trip, giving Hermione plenty of time to think about Ron and Harry. She was pretty sure neither of them had changed much, being only just over a month since she had seen them last. But she wondered if Ron was going to be okay. She hoped so. As angry as she was with him when she left Hogwarts, she never wished anything ill of him. She had figured once she and Draco married and were living away from Lucius, she could correspond as much as she pleased with her old friends. She was dying to write to Professor Dumbledore and tell him what was going on and that she was okay. She was sure that Professor McGonagall would be expecting to hear from her soon, too, and Hermione even considered writing Severus Snape to let him know that the Malfoys hadn't broken her yet.  
  
Hermione was grateful when the dark tunnel ended, almost thirty minutes after they began walking. She was exhausted as she climbed up the steep hill underground and burst out into the fresh air. There were several stars in the sky above and a bright, full moon. Hermione found her thoughts drifting to Remus Lupin, wondering where he was at that moment and how he was making out if it was a full moon.  
  
"Now the hospital is just over that hill," Draco said, pointing to the grassy knoll. "But I think it's best we wait until morning to go in."  
  
"Definitely," Hermione agreed. "But what are we going to do for the time being?"  
  
"Dunno," Draco confessed. He looked up at the sky, studying the stars intently. "We could sleep outside," he offered. "It doesn't look like it's going to rain."  
  
Hermione fought a yawn. She didn't want to tell him that she could sleep on a bed of nails at that point; she was just so tired. She hadn't been getting much sleep, feeling more stifled in the Manor than she had in her entire life. Dropping to the ground, she curled up into a ball. "Sounds good," she muttered. When she didn't feel any movement from Draco after a few moments, she opened her eyes again and looked up.  
  
Draco was standing above her looking rather uncomfortable. "I guess I'll sleep over here," he said, moving off to her right. "I'll stay awake for awhile to keep guard."  
  
"Okay," Hermione muttered sleepily. She wasn't going to argue with him, instead letting her mind be taken over by sleep. She fell into a mess of dreams, mixed with nightmares. Draco was hanging Ron by a thread over a cliff and Ron was screaming for Hermione.  
  
"We have to talk!" he was telling her and she agreed, trying to get to him. But when she attempted to move, she only felt more bound to the ground she was trying to leave. Screaming herself, she saw Harry in the distance.  
  
"Harry!" she cried. "Help me!" Harry looked up, but continued to walk, ignoring her cries. He looked isolated and detached from the rest of the world. Hermione started to cry and woke with a start.  
  
"Sorry," Draco said softly. "I didn't mean to startle you. But it's almost eight; we should get to the hospital."  
  
Hermione sat up, sore from sleeping in the same position all night. "Won't Lucius notice us gone?" she asked.  
  
Looking odder than before, Draco replied, "As long as we're back before noon, I don't think he'll care much."  
  
"Right." Hermione stood up and stretched, trying to work the kinks out of her body. She followed Draco, who looked completely exhausted, towards the hill. She didn't want to climb the massive mound, but she didn't complain and began to make her way up the hill.  
  
"It's like a miniature mountain," Draco grumbled and Hermione laughed.  
  
"You're awfully grumpy this morning. Didn't you sleep well?"  
  
"I didn't sleep at all!" Draco yawned. "I wanted to make sure we were both okay; you know werewolves come out during the full moons."  
  
"And it would be just like one was looking for us," Hermione answered sarcastically. "Why didn't you sleep?"  
  
"What do you care?" Draco replied moodily.  
  
"If I'm going to be stuck with you for the rest of my life, I don't want you being a complete crab," she told him, stopping for a moment. Taking a deep breath, she continued climbing the hill.  
  
"Whatever," he muttered, reaching the top. "Finally! Look, there's St. Mungo's right there." He began to descend the other side of the mountain. "And to think, we have to climb this monster in a few hours again."  
  
Hermione marvelled at Draco's ability to climb a mini mountain and complain the entire time, and still not run out of breath. She followed him towards the large building and up the first staircase. "We're here to see Ronald Weasley," Draco told the nurse behind the glass shield.  
  
"Third room on the left," the nurse told them, without looking up. Draco sat in the chair beside the nurse's booth and rested his head against the back of it.  
  
"Well?" he asked when Hermione failed to move. "Aren't you going?"  
  
"Right," she said, picking up her feet, urging them to move with the rest of her body. "I won't be long," she promised.  
  
"You better not be," he told her, "or else Father will kill us." He closed his eyes and proceeded to try and catch up on some rest before the long journey back.  
  
Hermione entered the third doorway on the left and noticed immediately that it seemed like the rest of the wizarding world had heard of Ron's accident. The room was filled with flowers and gifts.  
  
Ron stirred sleepily before opening his eyes slightly. Hermione noted that he didn't look all that bad. His right eye was a little bruised but other than that, there was no notable injuries.  
  
"Hermione," he said quietly, breaking into a soft smile. "Am I dreaming or just really lucky?"  
  
"I'm here, Ron," she whispered back, sitting in the chair beside his bed. "I came as soon as I heard. I'm really sorry."  
  
"For what?"  
  
Hermione had only intended to say she was sorry about the accident, but her words got caught in her throat. "For everything!" she wailed, burying her face in his hands. "For the engagement, for being such a brat our last few months of school, for the accident, for not writing to you sooner, for everything!" Tears rolled down her cheeks and before she could say anything, she heard voices in the hallway.  
  
"If Malfoy's out there, then Hermione must be here!" Harry said quietly, opening the door slowly. "Hermione!" he cried as soon as he saw her. "I didn't think you would actually make it." He came closer and hugged her tight, whispering in her ear. "I saw Malfoy out in the lobby."  
  
"I had to bring him," she confessed. "We had to sneak here in an underground tunnel; there was no other way."  
  
Harry just nodded and Hermione wasn't sure if he understood or not. Instead, she turned to Mrs. Weasley and hugged her tightly. "Hermione, dear," Mrs. Weasley said, pulling her back to study her. "It's been too long. How have you been?"  
  
"Okay," Hermione replied, not wanting to burden Mrs. Weasley with her petty problems. The poor woman looked absolutely exhausted and Hermione couldn't blame her. Turning towards the doorway, Hermione saw Ginny grinning at her. Without a word, the two friends embraced each other.  
  
"Looking forward to going back to Hogwarts?" Hermione asked, trying to keep the tremble out of her voice. It hurt to know that on September 1, Ginny, along with hundreds of others, would be boarding the Hogwarts Express while Hermione would be making last minute preparations for her wedding.  
  
"Yeah." Ginny shrugged, obviously sensing that Hermione didn't want to talk about the subject too much. "How's it going with the Malfoys?"  
  
"Okay," Hermione replied quickly, not too keen on that subject either. How could she explain that Draco was a different guy when away from school? Sure, he looked different with his hair down, but he was different on the inside, too. Instead of trying to explain, Hermione just shook her head. "I had better be getting back soon," she said softly. "Lucius doesn't know we're here and he'll kill us if he finds out."  
  
Harry gave her a sad glance. "Well, thanks for stopping by," he said. He gave Ron a sharp glance. "I thought you wanted to talk to her."  
  
"It can wait," Ron replied, smiling gently. "I'll send you an owl as soon as I can, Hermione," he told her. "Take care, though."  
  
Hermione made her rounds again, bidding everyone goodbye and hugging them, feeling awful for leaving so soon. But she promised to find a way to visit them at the Burrow when Ron made it home. 


	8. Outburst

Draco stood as soon as he saw her exit the room. "Ready?" he asked, holding his arm out. Fighting back the sobs, Hermione nodded and ignored his gesture, walking through the halls at a rapid rate. "What happened?" Draco asked, catching up to her.  
  
"Nothing," she muttered, wiping soft tears from her eyes. "I just hate leaving them."  
  
"I see," Draco said and it was suddenly clear to Hermione that he didn't see at all. He had never been torn away from his best friends and people he had come to think of as family. He had never been ripped away from the only strands of sanity he had. No, he didn't see at all, but instead of arguing with him, she just wanted to get back to the Manor and sleep for a few hours to get rid of the homely feelings that were stirring within her.  
  
The two of them were silent all the way back in the tunnel. When they reached the portrait, Draco reached out to swing it aside. "Wait!" Hermione cried, stretching her arms out to stop him. "How are we going to get your great aunt away from the portrait for us to get back through?"  
  
Draco halted. "I hadn't thought of that," he confessed. Turning to face her, he looked completely perplexed. "I guess we'll have to wait until she leaves again."  
  
Hermione gave him a scathing glance. "I don't think so," she said, swinging the portrait aside. Draco tried to stop her, but she shoved him away, entering the main foyer, covered in dirt from the long trek back to the Manor. She began dusting herself off as Draco slid the portrait back into place, careful not to wake his dozing great aunt.  
  
"See? That wasn't hard," Hermione said, finishing dusting herself off. She turned and headed into the kitchen, only to find Lucius hovering in front of her like a bad dream.  
  
"Where have you been?" he snarled at her. "I went upstairs to get Draco to arrange some more wedding plans and he wasn't in his room. He wasn't downstairs, he wasn't in the garden and he wasn't in your room." A bitter smile crossed his face. "And neither were you."  
  
"Wow, you're intelligent," Hermione quipped, feeling an immediate fury enter her bloodstream. She watched as his face twitched in anger and waited for the explosion.  
  
"How dare you," he began through gritted teeth. "Don't you ever speak to me like that again in my home. After all I've done for you, taken you in and given you a roof over your head, food in your stomach and a bed to sleep in. And this is how you treat me?"  
  
"I was perfectly fine where I was," Hermione replied, busying herself with her nails, trying to clean them of the dirt and grime from the tunnel. She was vaguely aware that Draco had come up behind her but so far, he hadn't made so much as a move to defend either Hermione or his father.  
  
"So where were you?" Lucius continued menacingly. "If I've told you once, I've told you a million times, I will have no sneaking around in my house!"  
  
"It's my fault, Dad," piped up Draco, causing both Lucius and Hermione to glare sharply at him. "A friend of mine from school is in St. Mungo's and I dragged Hermione with me to see him."  
  
"He's lying!" she exploded, pointing her finger at him. Draco looked shocked, but Hermione felt many weeks' rage, fury and hatred fill her frail body and she searched desperately for things to throw. Grabbing the nearest vase, filled with flowers, she heaved it to the ground where it smashed into little bits of pieces. Water and flowers were strewn across the floor, but Hermione didn't stop there. "He's lying!" she repeated, grabbing Great Aunt Rose's portrait and swinging it on the wall. She awoke with a screeching start.  
  
"I will not tolerate this!" Lucius roared, but he was no match for Hermione. The pain she had felt from her parents' betrayal, first not telling her that she was a pureblood, then agreeing to marry her off to such a horrible family, and the anger she felt from having to leave Harry and Ron, especially Ron when she loved him so dearly. And the confusion she felt for Draco wasn't helping. When she looked at him, she no longer saw the boy she once despised; instead there was a guy who was kind, caring and considerate and who just might make a good husband with a bit of training. She continued to swing the portrait, grabbing several figurines and slamming them to the marble floor.  
  
"I hate you!" she screamed at Lucius, heaving a statue of Venus at his face. He ducked just in time. "I hate you and what you've done to me! I went to see Ron Weasley and Harry Potter!" she confessed, enjoying the angered, shocked look that was slowly appearing on Lucius' face. "Yes, I went to see my dreaded friends-and I do have friends, Lucius-and there's nothing you could have done to stop me. It wasn't Draco's idea, nor was it his friend that was injured. It was mine and I snuck out of your very own house, right out from under your nose, and managed to go visit the horrible Potter and disgrace Weasley." She collapsed to the cool, marble floor, feeling more exhausted than she had in months. "And there's nothing you can do about it," she muttered sleepily to herself as she lay down.  
  
The scene in front of her was fading. The broken shards of glass had begun to fade in and out. The Venus state with her missing head and broken leg was coming in and out of focus. Hermione hazily heard Lucius say, "Draco, get her out of here. I don't want to look at her right now." Was it just Hermione's drowsy mind or did she detect a hint of fear in Lucius' voice?  
  
A pair of strong arms lifted her up from the floor and she groaned at the prospect of leaving the cool surface. The figure carried her up the stairs and to her room where it laid her on the bed and slowly brushed her wild hair out of her eyes.  
  
"I know you didn't mean to do all that," Draco's voice said, floating in from somewhere above her, "but Father will be angry when you come back downstairs. Maybe you should stay up here a while."  
  
"Right," Hermione muttered, or at least she thought she did. There was no reply as her door clicked shut. Sinking into the cool sheets, Hermione drifted off into a deep sleep.  
  
When she awoke, moonlight was streaming through her window. Standing up slowly, she tried to ignore the pounding that was pulsating in her brain. Looking out on the grounds, she noticed a dark figure sitting on the bench. Fighting the urge to yell out the window, she tiptoed down the staircase, worried that Lucius might be waiting up for her. When she failed to see him anywhere, she sneaked out the back door and into the garden.  
  
Owls hooted in the distance and the sweet scent of the surrounding flowers gave off a soothing impression. "Hey," she said as she sat beside Draco on the bench. "What are you doing out so late?"  
  
"It's not that late," he said, looking up at the sky. "It's only about a quarter after twelve."  
  
"Did I really sleep that long?" Hermione asked, more to herself than anyone.  
  
Draco nodded. "You needed it, though. You've been exhausted these past few days and a bit of sleep won't hurt you. Just make sure you stay up all day tomorrow because if you sleep during the day, you definitely won't be tired at night." He smiled weakly at her.  
  
"Was that you that carried me upstairs?" she asked timidly.  
  
"Does you head hurt?" he asked back.  
  
"What does that have to do with anything?"  
  
"Well, if it had been Father that carried you up, he would have bounced you on your head." He looked contemplative. "He was furious when I got back downstairs."  
  
"I'm sorry." Hermione lowered her head. "I didn't want to create any trouble for you."  
  
"You didn't," he replied in the same cool tone. "It was kind of funny, actually. He started yelling and complaining about you and Mother finally had enough of it. 'Who's idea was this marriage, Lucius?' she asked him. Father shut right up." Draco let out a hollow, forceful laugh. "He didn't know whether to laugh or cry. Mother never stands up to him. I see you've made a change in all of us."  
  
Hermione laughed quietly to herself. "Thanks for going with me to the hospital," she finally admitted. "I didn't really want to go by myself."  
  
"Anytime," he replied. "Not that I think it's too good you go gallivanting around with the two of them but you are good friends," he said thoughtfully. "Just don't let Father see you, ever."  
  
"Oh, I won't," Hermione assured him, wondering why Draco had taken on such a considerate act. Deciding not to push her luck, she stood up and began making her way back to the Manor. "I better go back to bed," she told him, smiling faintly in the moonlight. "I'm a little tired, still, and I want to be fully awake in the morning."  
  
"Goodnight," Draco told her, avoiding her gaze. "I'll see you tomorrow."  
  
She walked away from him, thinking how odd it was that it was tomorrow already. She entered the Manor, eager to steer clear of any signs of Lucius or Narcissa. In her room, she collapsed on her bed again, only to fall into a restless sleep filled with more dreams than before. 


	9. Mrs Malfoy?

September drew nearer and Malfoy Manor was filled with people to the brim. Decorators joined Narcissa around the clock to determine exactly what type of flowers would be suitable for the ceremony, which was to be held outdoors, on the Malfoy property. Dressmakers came around often to take Hermione's measurements for the white gown that she was to wear on the morning of September fourth. Caterers filled the kitchen, often making it difficult to get through the house without being assaulted in the process.  
  
In the last week of August, Hermione found time to settle down and read more of Lily's diary. Lily continued to talk about Remus, even though her words were more hollowed than before. I can't help but think that Voldemort knows the whereabouts of the Order. I can't help but worry that by angering him that night, he might turn on us all and kill us. But most of all, I worry about Harry. He's just a defenceless little boy; how could he stand up against the most feared wizard of all times? He's definitely not capable and it brings tears to my eyes what might happen if Voldemort happens to show up on the doorstep again. I shudder to think of the consequences.  
  
On the other hand, Halloween is approaching. James and I debated on whether or not we should dress Harry up and take him out for the evening. I'm saying no, it's not safe with Voldemort on the loose. James is determined, telling me that he won't dare strike with so many people around. That's never stopped him before.  
  
The entry ended there and a few pages were left blank. Hermione skipped ahead, hoping that wasn't going to be the last of the entries. She was spared when she noticed more of Lily's writing under the heading of October 31.  
  
Halloween's finally here! I love this holiday so much! It's like Christmas time for the witches and wizards. I relented and James is currently dressing Harry up as a dragon. We agreed to take him out while it's still light, then get him home to bed before darkness falls. I can't wait to see the look on Mrs. Willow's face when she sees Harry's cute costume. It will be worth the entire ordeal.  
  
Well, I should get going. James is yelling that Harry is ready to go, but he's acting rather fussy. I do hope he's going to be all right for the night. I don't want to keep him out too long, though, because my stomach is in knots already. I don't know why, but there's something looming over my head that's dark and disturbing. Oh, well, I had better ignore it and get out there with the rest of my family. It's going to be a night to remember.  
  
With that, the diary ended. Hermione flipped through the remaining pages, finding nothing. Tears settled in the back of her eyes as she re- read the sentence, "It's going to be a night to remember." She knew from seven years as Harry's friend that his parents died on Halloween night of that year. If only Lily knew; if only she could see ahead to the future and know what was in store for her, she might have spent the time indoors, packing to get ready to leave. Voldemort wouldn't have found them if they had left that night.  
  
What a world Hermione lived in. A world full of 'what-ifs' and doubts. What if a certain person had done this? What if a certain person had done such a thing in a different way? Would their lives had been affected? If Lily and James had been alerted to Voldemort's impending actions, and had they left, would they still be alive today or would Voldemort had found them somewhere else and killed them?  
  
Hermione's thoughts drifted from their deaths to Lily's life. It had been an interesting journey and Hermione was glad to have seen part of it. It hurt her to think that Lily had given up the man she loved, Remus, for her own safety and for Remus' peace of mind. Could Hermione do the same? Could she give up Ron and be a Malfoy for life? Naturally, when she and Draco married, she would take on the Malfoy name, but it took more than that to make a true marriage. Could she open her soul and let it accept the fact that she was truly a Malfoy and would never be Hermione Weasley? Was it even possible for her to comprehend such an action?  
  
Part of her didn't really believe that the wedding would ever take place. Part of her soul believed that her knight on a white horse would arrive just before the minister pronounced them husband and wife to whisk her away to a fairy tale life that she could never have dreamed of before. But there was still that part of reality that brought her back and slapped her in the face. In less than two weeks, she would walk down the makeshift aisle in the backyard of the Manor and join Draco for all eternity. What a scary thought.  
  
"Hermione! Dad's sending post in twenty minutes! Bring down any letters you have!" Draco's voice floated up the stairs and Hermione grabbed the letter she had written to her parents and prepared to take it downstairs. On second thought, she grabbed her quill and a piece of parchment from the desk. Jotting quickly, she wrote a note to Harry, explaining that the wedding was soon and she would visit him and Ron as soon as they got settled in their new home. "Please tell Ron not to hate me," she wrote. "I'll write again soon."  
  
She added, "There's a letter in here for Harry; could you forward it to him?" to her parents' letter and resealed the envelope. Smiling to herself as she walked downstairs, she thought, "At least when I marry Draco, we'll be in our own place, away from Lucius' prying eyes."  
  
The morning of September 4th, Hermione awoke with a massive headache and severe nausea. Holding her stomach and her head, she hurriedly jumped in the shower, heeding to Lucius' impatient calls. "You'll be late for your own wedding!" he called up the stairs.  
  
"They can't start without me!" Hermione yelled back. Lucius hadn't mentioned that day when Hermione destroyed part of the house since the incident, and Hermione was thankful. She felt much more relaxed in the Manor since her little outburst and she knew that she just had to let off a little steam at the time.  
  
After her shower, she styled her hair the way she wanted, only to be made up again by the makeup artist waiting downstairs. Butterflies flitted impatiently in the pit of her stomach as she stood, stone-faced, while the matrons made last minute alterations to her dress. When she finally got to put the dress on, she smiled at her reflection, despite the situation. The long, pure white gown drifted gently to the floor where it lay around her feet, which sported white high-heeled slippers. Her long hair had been tamed for the day and lay in soft curls around her shoulders. The veil fell nicely in front of her face and Hermione fought back the tears.  
  
For as long as she had been their friend, Hermione had dreamt of having Harry and Ron at her wedding. Even more so, she had dreamt of Ron being at her side at the altar and Harry as their best man. Instead, Draco was waiting at the end of the aisle in the backyard and Crabbe and Goyle were waiting as best men. There had been a huge squabble over which of Draco's goonies were going to be best man, so when they resorted to violence, hexing each other rapidly, Draco interfered and announced that both Crabbe and Goyle were going to be best men. Hermione thought it was rather childish of the both of them, but seeing as she didn't get to pick her wedding party, and the bridesmaids and maid of honour were all friends and family of the Malfoys, Hermione didn't see much fairness in the entire wedding.  
  
Mr. Granger approached his daughter, looking bashful. "You look beautiful," he whispered to her as he held his arm out. "I just wish this day could have been brought about by better circumstances."  
  
"Me, too," Hermione whispered back, not being entirely truthful. She had grown fond of Draco Malfoy in the past few weeks, but she felt she was still a long way from loving him. She joined her father's side, gripping his arm tightly, and left the safety of her tent, stepping into the sunshine of September. Draco was waiting for her at the altar, smiling self-consciously. Crabbe and Goyle were waiting patiently beside each other, often giving one another a sharp shove, both receiving dirty looks from Draco. Lucius was beside the minister, giving snide looks to anyone who dared to glance his way. Narcissa was at his side, looking as dotty and spacey as ever before.  
  
The minister began with a few words after Hermione's father had left her, with tears in his eyes, at the side of Draco. Then he began the ceremony, leaving Hermione's imagination to roam. When it came time for her to take Draco as her husband, she hesitated, causing both Mrs. Granger and Lucius to cast looks of panic at one another. "I do," she finally said and the two of them released their tense breaths in a long whoosh. Draco repeated her actions while Hermione began searching desperately for her knight in shining armour. Where was he? Why wasn't he rescuing her? Maybe the wedding really was going to take place. Her breath began to come in quick gasps and she felt that she was suffocating.  
  
"I now pronounce you husband and wife," said the minister, smiling at them. "You may kiss the bride." Hermione's breath caught in her throat as Draco leaned towards her. She closed her eyes and gritted her teeth but the kiss was quick and painless. She followed Draco down the aisle again, watching in a dream world as the guests threw flower petals in front of their path.  
  
She had done it. She had survived the wedding. Now she had to survive the rest of her life as Mrs. Draco Malfoy.  
  
A/N: That's the end of this story, but I'm doing a sequel called "Sounds of a Breaking Heart" that will be up soon. Hope you all enjoy! 


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